Sunday, September 2, 2007


I got an official looking letter in the mail. I have been ordered to appear in court! From what I can tell, this has to do with the rollover accident that I witnessed a couple months ago. You know, the one where the only thing I noticed was the color of the truck that rolled over. But I did give my name and address to the cop who showed up. I suppose I should call the lawyers and tell them how useless I will be, but I have never been a witness before, and I'm kinda looking forward to the experience. (And I can wear my new suit)

I am fascinated with the legal process. I was called to jury duty several years ago and the case was rather pointless but I was enthralled with the drama of it being acted out before my eyes. And I liked the deliberating part. The jurors quickly elected ME their foreman, and then we all admitted that we wished someone would have screamed out You want the truth? You can't HANDLE the truth! And when I got to read off the verdict I wanted to say "Not-guilty-AMUNDO" but I didn't.

Even though my father was an attorney I have had very little exposure to courtroom drama. He never liked us to watch legal shows because he thought they were fake and that he didn't like to bring his work home into his house. (Although I have come to find out that in other families the kids didn't have to sign a contract regarding whose day it was to do the dishes.)

So my knowledge of the courtroom process has come from sitcoms and soap operas. Such as last month on General Hospital where Liz had to testify about what she was doing with Jason on the night that Alcazar was allegedly killed, which calls into question the paternity of baby Jake. Poor Lucky!

I doubt if any paternity secrets are going to be revealed in this car accident case, but if someone shows up in a neck brace I am going to throw my briefcase on the floor.

Objection! Sustained!


Heather Leigh said...

WOW! How thrilling! Do you think you'll get to be entered into the witness protection program? I always wanted to be a protected witness!!

Mindy said...

ooh I hadn't thought of that. I would get a whole new identity. Maybe they would make me over to look like Jessica Simpson...

kid_curry said...

I got to put a sex offender away for a longtime. Maybe there was alcohol avoided? Did you see away weaving? Weaving? Hell, I don't even knit. That's from Robin Williams. Sorry it's late, late, late. I must go to bed.