Contempt of Court

Maybe you remember the time I stopped to help after witnessing the Rollover accident, and then later got subpoenaed to court as a witness. I like to think of my self as a good citizen, which is why I stopped at the accident scene in the first place, and why I planned to attend the trial. That and the fact that the subpoena was an official document with a Seal of the Supreme Court on it and had this sentence in bold black print:

FAILURE TO OBEY THE COMMANDS OF THE SUBPOENA OR APPEAR AT THE STATED TIME AND PLACE MAY SUBJECT YOU TO PENALTY FOR CONTEMPT OF COURT.

This wouldn't have been too difficult except that the court date was for October 31. I happen to have other things to do that day, #1 being be at work, and I'm out of vacation days. But I asked and found out that there is a policy for this and I would be excused similar to jury duty. #2 is that it is a half-day at the elementary school. So I signed Jeffrey up for a field trip with the extended day program. It's expensive but I wanted to make sure he would be cared for. #3 is that I have always attended (and often organized) the class party and school parade, usually I use vacation time for this important day. This time I donated chips ahead of time and hoped that if my obligation at the court ended early there might be time for me to at least stop in. #4 is that Halloween is always a day with a huge traffic jam because all of the working husbands have been instructed to get home early enough for trick or treating. #5 is that at work they were having a week long international business meeting in my department, and the highlight was to be a department-wide luncheon that day with everyone in costume. On my very first day when I met the executive director he encouraged me to participate in this. Since I knew I couldn't be there, I offered to help organize my work group's costumes, there was a circus theme. I put together a spreadsheet of costume ideas, and my boss liked the "Lion Tamer" idea. He would say he needed to talk to me and I'd get the status of my project together only to find out it was about the costumes. I had to repeatedly explain why I would be absent that day, and did not pay for the lunch.

The subpoena came with a letter from the attorney that contained the line:

"It is always wise to call the court the day before, or the day of the scheduled hearing to verify that the case has not been rescheduled."

So I did that, and after finally getting through the recorded-menu maze I got a clerk on the line and asked about this case, by number. She looked it up and said: "Oh....it looks like that was rescheduled for October 23...but the defendant didn't show up." Incredulous, I asked: "So I shouldn't go anywhere? Why wasn't I informed of the change?" She assured me that there was nothing for me to attend, but suggested I call the lawyer's office for an explanation.

So I did, and got an assistant on the phone. I asked her if I would be in contempt of court for not showing up anywhere. She said no. But why wasn't I told of anything? She said: "Oh, well that's why we put that disclaimer on there, because we really don't keep track of who we sent subpoenas to."

I am flabbergasted.

I ended up working from home that day and taking an hour to go over to the school, and of course having a good Halloween. But still...just who was in contempt of whom in this case?

contempt (kən-těmpt') –noun
1.the feeling with which a person regards anything considered mean, or worthless; disdain; scorn.
2.the state of being despised; dishonor; disgrace.
3.Law.
a.willful disobedience to or open disrespect for the rules or orders of a court (contempt of court) or legislative body.
b.an act showing such disrespect.

Trick or Treat

Things I love about this night:

All the neighborhood lit up, and everyone is out in it.

Adorable little toddlers dressed as fuzzy animals who just make noises for "trick or treat."

Our porch decorations, added to every year, to make sure our house is a "must go to."

Giving out glowing bracelets to the kids that I know the best.

The little Smiles girls, even more lovely when dressed up like princesses.

Timmy stopping home for a minute and letting me dig out some chocolates to munch while I sat on the porch.

When Tim's friend Lewis was at our house when they finished the sub, and he laid down on the lawn and then jumped at kids that walked by.

When Missy the cat went darting out into the darkness and thank goodness we caught her.

Jeffrey as Elvis saying "Thank you, thankyouverymuch" and getting a laugh.

When the little Spartan football players thanked me for putting on the sub parade on Sunday.

That Nee Nee who moved away this year was in the neighborhood again, but crying because she missed everyone.

That a lot of the dads walking down the street were carrying "beverages."

The sense of community I get when I realize I know almost all of these people and their kids.

When people know about my kids allergies and try to give them candy they can have.

Betsy the spoiled little white dog in costume.

Scaring the kids with our bowl with the fake hand on the outside and the black glove on the inside.

That the blasting rain paitently waited until after it was al over to come pouring down.

And my favorite, when a girl looked at me and asked: "Is that your real hair?"

And what are you supposed to be?

Today was the deadline for getting Jeff's Halloween costume ready: the first party of the season. After this it's the subdivision parade that I organize every year, and then his class party and finally trick-or-treating on Halloween night. There is less for Tim to do this year, but he is going to go trick-or-treating. At first we had the idea that they could be the guys from their favorite TV show "Mythbusters" and we started thinking up how to do those costumes but I was concerned that when Jeff went to things alone his wouldn't make sense. And then he announced that he wanted to be ELVIS. How could I argue with that one? Luckily they had an Elvis costume at our local costume shop, although I had to spend a little more on it than I would have liked. I figure that there aren't many big costume years left, so I justified the splurge. Plus Tim's costume won't cost that much, he wants to be a Christmas tree, and I think we already have everything we need in storage.

I just love the Halloween holiday for a lot of reasons, but most of all the dressing up. It is great fun to pull together an outfit, making every detail just right. And you get to pretend to be someone else, it's fun! I already wrote about the ill-fated orange-princess-over-the-winter-jacket fiasco from my childhood (Oh look she's a pumpkin!) but that didn't stop me from trying again every year. In my memory the costume thing was left up to us kids to figure out from what we had around the house, we rarely went out and bought anything. And if you weren't creative the fallback was "bum." Nowadays that would translate to "Homeless Person" and would be extremely politically incorrect.

Another way I know that times have changed is when I look at the flyer for Halloween USA that comes in the mailbox this time of year. It lends credence to the scene in the movie "Mean Girls" where Halloween is a contest for who can look the sluttiest. I know that it wasn't that way when I was that age, at least for me. In those years I made good use of my Grandpa's high quality Knights of Columbus cape and went as a witch.

It's been a while since I've had the occasion to dress up myself. Probably not since last year for Alisa's groovy 60's party. Which was great fun, I found the best miniskirt, and then went and got a lot of mod accessories to go with it. I know I put far more effort into that getup than I would for a similar event wearing "regular clothes." It was a great party, and all of the outfits were hilarious. When I showed my mother the pictures, she gasped. She was horrified that we were wearing things that she used to wear, and now they were silly costumes.

So when do someone's "regular clothes" become a costume? When Elvis Presley pulled on his white jumpsuit could he ever have imagined that 30 years after his death a 9 year old kid would be instantly recognizable as him when dressed that way? I fear that anything we are wearing, at any time could someday be considered a "costume." In a way, everything is. Any time I assemble a special "look" that's really what I'm doing. I'm dressing up like a bike rider, or a wedding guest, or an engineer, witness in a courtroom, stay at home mom going to pick her kid up at the bus stop.

I remember in college the sorority had a special event called "Senior Send Off" where the juniors would make a special breakfast for the graduating seniors, and then perform skits making fun of them. And they would dress up like the person by sneaking into the closets and pulling out someone's signature "look". It was hilarious. And I still remember when a girl named Julie dressed up like me; she put on my ratty old plaid bathrobe and carried an engineering textbook and a pile of junk food.

So maybe that line in between everyday fashions and way out there costumes is actually more of a blur. But if you think about it: if someone went as YOU, what would they have on?

Like lipid pools of nuclear waste

My eyes have been bothering me when I have my contacts in, and I am starting to get that problem of not being able to read things with small print. I did pick up some very cute purple reading glasses with little rhinestones at Target, but they don't really work for me. So I went to the optometrist, it was time for that anyways. When I got there the desk girl showed me a description of a new machine that they have that takes a picture of your retina. It isn't covered by insurance, she said, but it can find serious problems. I agreed and I got to look into this enormous space-age looking contraption. When I went back into the dark eye exam room, the Dr. pulled up a picture on her screen of my eyes. Left eye looked good, right eye has a little white blob on it. She pointed it out and told me that is what something called "mascular degeneration" would look like, but in my case it was probably just a reflection. They we did the "what is the last line that you can read" routine and she gave me a package of new contact lenses to try. We were going to do an experiment of what she called "monovision" where one eye is for close up and the other is for far. Okay. Then I went back to the desk girl and forked over a pile of money for the retina scan and contact lens fitting.

Well by the time I got home my vision was already weird, but she told me it would take a while to get used to it. For the next several days my vision got worse, especially in my right eye. At work it got so bad I could barely read my computer. Good old Bob tried to help, he got a box for me to put my computer on to position it for better viewing. He suggested that sometimes vision problems are caused by diabetes. Another symptom of that is extreme thirst. Hey, I have been feeling thirsty. I also made the mistake of mentioning this to my mother, who totally freaked out and looked up vision problems in "Merck's Manual" and came up with a big list of horrifying things that could be wrong with me, and then kept calling me to ask about it. Finally it got so bad that I just ripped the contacts out and turned to wearing my glasses, which I don't normally do because they make me look like Jimmy Neutron's teacher Mrs. Fowell. And I went back to the optometrist.

I told her about my bad vision, hurting eyes, and sense of terror about the inconclusive retina scan. She re-did the scan, and then checked my eyes another way by putting in florescent yellow eye drops. That allowed her to scan for scratches with a black light. After she put the drops in there was nothing to wipe my eyes with so she went looking for kleenex while I blinked and cried this stuff all over my face. Finally, she was able to determine that there's nothing seriously wrong with my eyes or vision. It was that the contacts I was trying were a smaller diameter than my usual ones and had irritated my eyes. She ordered a different kind and wrote me a prescripton for eye drops.

Since I was nearby I went to Kroger to get the prescription. While I was there I walked around the store looking at things. I like that center aisle called "seasonal." I was looking at the Halloween decorations, there were all kinds of spooky things with fake blood and yellow eyes...YELLOW EYES! I hadn't looked in a mirror since she put the eyedrops in! I was a spooky thing with florescent yellow eyes! I hurried home as quickly as I could, I hope I didn't scare anybody too much.

Get thee to a Monastery

The city that we live in is at the very outer edge of what can be described as a metropolitan area. It is only in recent years that it started to become "suburban" with new construction popping up all around the few structures that were already there. The "country." So we have these recent subdivisions all mixed in with cottages and some formerly secluded properties such as the Dominican Sisters Motherhouse that I have mentioned before. It is actually a campus of buildings that consists of an old mansion facing a small lake with a darling white glassed in gazebo, a daycare/preschool, several structures for retreats and offices, a small cemetery, the giving garden, and a main structure that is newer which is really a nursing home for nuns and a chapel that is open to the public for mass on Sundays. There used to be an old abandoned mental hospital on some property in the back and I when I would ride my bike around there I'd get a creepy feeling. Then they sold that property and ripped it down and built luxury homes where it used to be. (Do they know?) We often attend mass at the chapel and I get to see the nuns. Mainly they are extremely elderly but there are a few "younger" ones (in their 60s) who always impress me as sort of strong yet gentle women in incredibly comfortable looking shoes.


Several miles east down the same road is a Benedictine Monastery. The road is dirt and it goes up a hill where the land is still mainly undeveloped, very beautiful area. On my more ambitious bike rides I used to go past the entrance and wonder about it. You can only see the sign and a driveway through the woods from the road. I always wanted to make a lot of noise when I drove by, break that vow of silence, but I didn't.


Then recently I found out that they have mass there that the public can attend. A chance to satisfy my curiosity! I have this fascination about monks, and it's not from reading The Mermaid Chair in book club. Really. I just wonder what they're all about.





So today we went there and I got to take these pictures so I could share them with you. It would have been a great place for viewing the fall colors except for that the odd weather we've had has made for a dud of a color season so far. The property sits upon the highest point in Oakland county, and the view from the chapel is incredible. It is nothing like I expected. I guess I thought it would be dark and gothic and made of crumbling stone. The architecture is very unusual and it seems relatively new.





The monks were there, there are only about 1/2 dozen of them, and they look like normal men. They were wearing black robes with hoods, but they had normal dress shoes on with them, not ropey sandals. Apparently they spend their time in this beautiful place tending to their large garden, playing with their 2 large dogs, doing art, writing poetry, and praying. It sounds lovely, doesn't it. Oh! And they make jam and salad dressing. I know this because it was there in THE GIFT SHOP!!! Yes, there really is a gift shop there. Now you know too.

High Maintenance

"Did anyone ever tell you you're high maintenance?"

That's what the man who sits across the aisle asked me today. The answer is NO, I have not been told that. The situation at the moment was there were 2 facilities men laying on the floor of my cubicle with flashlights and tools trying to rescue my lunchbag and purse who had somehow gotten themselves trapped inside my desk file drawer. They finally got it open by smashing into the thing with a giant bang and then wrenching it open. Before I called them I had asked Bob to to help to try to get the drawer open and we tried our own series of banging and jimmying and wrenching.

Earlier in the day I had decided that the screen on my laptop was too smeary and asked Bob if he had any cleaner for it, which he did but when we inspected it decided it might not be the right kind and I got the IT guy to give me a special little wipe, like a wet-nap. And I also noticed that my cubicle smelled weird and ended up going to Wal-Mart at lunchtime and buying some citrus scented cleaner, and showing it to Bob. And the day before I had managed to pinch a nerve in my back by sitting down too quickly. When I complained about it to Bob he showed me some stretches that might help and we stood in our cubicles practicing them.

Oh dear. I have become "high maintenance." When did that happen? It must stop.

Note to self: Try not to bother poor old Bob so much.

Tulips

We are having a bout of unusual weather for early October. It is in the 80's, sunny and humid. I am LOVING it. One last blast of the weather I like the best. Today I took a long bike ride where I could see a lot of the lakes around here, and then I planted some tulip bulbs that Jeff and I grabbed last week when we were at the hardware store for something else. They caught my eye because they contained my favorite tulip that I had at our last house, called Shirley. It is an ivory color with a purple edging, almost lacy looking. And I always remembered that name, it reminds me of my best friend's mother. I wonder if she knows she has a flower namesake. I've always liked it that roses and some tulips have names, it adds to the fun. The other ones I put in today are called Demeter, and "Mauve Mix." (boring!) I like planting bulbs in the fall because when they come up in the spring I get to remember what I was doing when I planted them. And they look so great when everything else is still struggling to get going. But then there are those ugly brown stems to look at later. I know that there are ways to hide them but I've never had success at that. If all goes well then sometime in May I will put up pictures of beautiful flowering tulips.

Potential Chaos

There were two big “news items” recently that I found I had a similar reaction to. The first was the national strike at GM last week. I drove to work hearing about how the strike was set to begin at 11:00 am unless an agreement was reached. So at 10:59 I got up and asked people if a bell was going to go off, or what. There wasn’t much activity that I could notice but at the end of the day there were some picketers at the end of the drive into the property. It was nice out so I had my windows down, and when I stopped at the light there was a man standing there with his sign, just a couple of feet away. It was hard not to make eye contact, and he had one of those blue worker shirts on, and reminded me of my Grandpa. I said “Well you got a nice day for this.” He nodded. Light still red, I went on: “I hope it doesn’t have to last too long.” He nodded again. Then the light turned. “I wish you well with it!” I said as I pulled away, and he kind of lifted his sign to me, like a thank-you gesture. The next day at work there were a lot of emails about what to do if strikers tried to block your entrance, and how to avoid altercations with them. There were also emails about how our building would be affected, such as closing down some of the bathrooms, and what to do with your food garbage since building maintenance is union. I was amused to see some ladies in high heels struggling to empty a garbage can into a dumpster. (They had supervisors performing some of their worker’s tasks.) And I wondered whether I as being a SCAB when I walked over to the main garbage area to toss out my apple core, instead of letting it rot in the can at my desk. But then agreement was reached and it was all over. Inventory adjustment? We’ll never know.

The other was the big buildup to the state government shutdown that was going to happen by Sunday night if a budget agreement wasn’t achieved. Since I was up north watching silly movies I was insulated from a lot of that but I still had the sensation of going to bed not knowing if the next morning there would be prisoners out roaming the streets and people not being able to apply for trailering licenses or whatever the impact would be. But agreement was reached and everything went back to normal except for the effects of the new budget on taxes and services.

All of this reminded me of the time we all believed that some BIG thing was going to happen which was Y2K, when all of the computers were going to shut down on New Year’s Day 2000 and so we had to fill our tanks with gas and bathtubs with water and buy cans of SPAM to eat when all of the grocery stores shut down after the looting was over and there would be no food left and giraffes would roam the streets since the gates to the zoo were electronic. I felt a kind of disappointment that I didn’t go to any parties that year because we were sitting at home checking the batteries in our flashlights. And then the next day when Larry said he had to go to the store because we were out of diapers and formula and I had to think what were we doing with SPAM and all this bottled water but not enough supply of the essential things for our baby to last even 2 days? But again, nothing actually happened after all the big buildup.

I am almost ashamed to admit that there is a small part of me in these situations that wants to wish that the BIG THING will happen, and shake everyone up and out of their mundane daily lives and force them to really think about who and what is important, and sort of start over with a fresh perspective, do it all different. This is probably why I even LIKE it where there are disaster drills at work, where everyone has to stop what they are doing and go and stand in the hall, or outside. And there we all are, a big group of carbon-based life forms all equal as we follow the instructions, and no one gets out of it just because they have an office with walls or wear a blue work shirt or have the authority to put a stop to that Engineering Change you were trying to get approved. Just for that moment, we are all just people who just might need each other’s help someday just because they are they ones standing nearby when IT happens.

And of course there have been some actual BIG THINGS that actually have happened such as 9/11 and Katrina that maybe could have resulted in everything changing for the better, but then, sadly, didn’t.

Maybe it’s time I realize that there isn’t going to be some external BIG THING that comes along and rocks my world. But I can rock my own world by making big changes like the ones I have in the last year. And though they don’t affect the collective consciousness of the people around me like I wish something would, I now know that I do have the power within me to shake things up enough to make it all seem different. Even if only just a little.

Packing List for Chick Trip

Tomorrow evening I'm heading up north for a girl's scrapbooking weekend. Everyone shares responsibility for meals, and because of That One Time (Okay, those VERY FEW times) that I just happened to fill the cottage up with smoke in my attempts to make French Toast, I am in charge of "other." Here is what I have ready:

2 Rental Movies: "Evening" and "Music and Lyrics." Chick Flicks. There will also be the full series of SATC. We have been known to just put "Bridget Jones Diary" in and let it repeat in a continuous loop, but it's time for something new.

Ho-Ho's. Hostess brand, not the Little Debbie kind that I picked up once when I was in a rush, and will now forever be know as "Faux Ho's." Also Raspberry Milano Cookies, Gihardelli Mint Chocolates, and frozen turtle cookie dough.

Kettle flavor popcorn, Garlic Hommous, Salsa, and Chips.

Frozen Pizza Rolls

Grapes

Margarita Mix

Oprah Magazine

Paper plates and napkins. I went with a red-and-white checkered theme. No one wants to do dishes.

Plus my clothes and gaint roller-luggage of scrapbooking supplies, ready to go.


I'm looking forward to a fun weekend. I hope you have a good one too!


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UPDATE

We had a nice time, and I got a lot of pages done. I brought too much food (possible oxymoron?) and those two movies were BAD. I still don't understand why the nurse was wearing that white party dress. But it's always great to get away, and have fun being with the girls.

A Cheater and a Thief

I decided to go shopping. I really needed to get some new clothes for work. I didn't get enough the first time and I've found that when I don't like what I have on, it really affects my attitude about the day. The only problem is that I'm just not a very good shopper. I don't have the natural knack for it like Mary Beth or Susie, and I'm also hard to fit, my proportions never seem to match up to whatever they had in mind when they constructed the clothes. And I don't put outfits together very well. What I think is a great "tweedy look" has been described by my helpful friends as "Miss Jane Hathaway." If there was some kind of service where I could just sign up to have perfectly fitting, in-style and appropriate clothing delivered straight to my mailbox every season I'd do that and skip the stores altogether.

I had mentioned to Mary Beth on the phone that I was thinking about going to Parisian on Saturday. After we hung up the phone rang and it was her again, making sure I knew that they were having a sale event where you get extra discounts if you bring in items to donate to Goodwill. She would have felt bad if she had let me go to the store without knowing this.

So I went down to the basement where I knew we had a bag of stuff that I set aside for our next donation. A lot of it was old sweatpants that really should have just been turned into rags. I wasn't sure how this was going to work, walking into a fancy store full of beautiful things with some old stuff and then saving money on new stuff. And what was going to happen when I got there, would one of those manicured sales ladies inspect my goods and then decide if they were discount worthy? Nervously I decided on quality over quantity and selected a polo shirt of Larry's that was still very nice, a pair of never-worn brightly colored slipper-socks that had been taking up all the room in my sock drawer, and a pair of expensive-looking black shoes that Becky had passed along to me because they fit her weird, and they didn't fit me right either. I put them into a bag and headed out to shop.

When I got to the store there was a lady at a table. I held up my bag and she said "Do you have five items in there?" I said, "Well, kind of..." As I considered whether a PAIR of something was one item or two. She just handed me a pack of 5 coupons stapled together, and told me to put my bag into one of the giant bins behind me. So I flung the bag in without anyone seeing what what was in it. Five coupons for 20% off of an item. But I felt a little guilty about it.

Right near there was the jewelry counter. I picked out a pair of tiger-eye earrings and some gold hoops. Then I went upstairs and made the circle around the ladies clothing department two times, but didn't find anything I even wanted to try on. I went over to the children's area and picked up sweatshirts for the boys, on sale plus the coupon makes it a very good deal. Suddenly, loud music started playing and a pack of little girls with makeup and hairpieces leaped out of an area labeled "Libby Lu." They wore matching clothes and had little backpacks with something about shopping on them. A birthday party, I think. Then a saleslady led them in a little dance, something about shopping. "Pay attention girls," I thought, "or you'll turn out like me!" I followed the parade of them down the escalator, to the purse area.

I have had my purse for a couple of years, it is my best fashion purchase EVER. I got it at a purse party at Heather's. Alisa and Lynn came along and convinced me to buy it so we could do a buy 2 get one 1/2 off deal and split the savings. It is very cute. So cute that wherever I go, women off all types shout out at me "CUTE PURSE!" But now it's getting old, the fake designer label has fallen off and it's looking a little ragged. And it gapes open because it's not big enough for all my stuff. So I began shopping for a new one. I had to shuffle around the things I was holding so that I could weigh the different choices, trying to gage how heavy each would be without the stuffing but with all my contents. I finally settled on this one because even though there are buckles it is lightweight and there is this little LIGHT in there that goes on when you open it! Now that I had five items I started towards the register but when I looked at my things...there was only ONE gold hoop earring on the little holder card thing. I furtively placed it on a counter with some tags and employee type things.

So you probably guessed by now that when I got home and transferred the things from my old purse to my new one...there was that other gold hoop earring! NOW what am I supposed to do with it? Bringing it back to the store would be inconvenient and waste a lot of gas, and would they ever be able to match it with it's partner after a few days? Find a needy pirate with a pierced ear? Any one out there want it? Please advise, dear blog readers, I will do whatever you say is right.

A Machine for any Gender

Now that I'm back at work it seems like there is so much less time leftover for everything else. But I'm trying to keep my priorities straight, and remember that quality time spent with my boys ranks highest. Except that they are getting to the ages where their top choices for things to do aren't inclined to involve their mother. So this morning, even though I was feeling, er, tired after a late night out celebrating Alisa's birthday, I was agreeable when Jeffrey woke me up and told me all about his idea for a special project we could do today.

Jeffrey told me that today we could go to the fabric store and get some of the fuzzy fabric that he saw when we were there several months ago. And then we could make a new bed for our little cat Missy. Okay, we can do that! Never mind that Missy already has 2 beds and there are giant piles of laundry and dirty floors and dishes all around, my little boy wants to spend time doing something with his Mommy so that's what we'll do.

I have so enjoyed having sons but when they were first born I had that pang of regret that I would never get to to all the girl things that mothers and daughters are supposed to do together. Like go to the fabric store to get materials for craft projects. I see them around, dressed nicely and shopping together, holding up items and remarking about how cute they are. And I think about how different that is from me hollering down the aisle at two boys who are trying to see how far they can coast the shopping cart with both of them standing on it. But strangely enough, they do like the fabric store. And if you think about it, it is a cool place, all these colorful bolts stacked high, every one different, and all the gizmos and gadgets and organizers and things to see, and the possibilities they all hold for a new creation yet to be assembled. And there's nothing that says you have to be female to appreciate that.

I think that I have become hyper-sensitive about making sexist assumptions from having to overcome so much of that throughout my career of trying to be accepted as an engineer at an auto company. I eventually had to face the fact that there I was in one of the most macho saturated industries striving against the hard held belief that to deserve to be there you need motor oil running through your veins instead of blood. And I did not grow up playing with little cars and tinkering under the hood of my first jalopy like all of them. I played with a my Barbie camper and tinkered with my sewing machine. So now I believe that while Corvette worship may be a predominantly male characteristic, mechanical ability isn't necessarily gender specific.

Which brings me back to the situation of my son's fascination with sewing. If they are not already conditioned to think that it is a thing for girls, then you can see why they would be attracted to this object that has a speed-control pedal, and makes a choppy noise, and comes with a nifty tool kit including lube oil and you can make stuff with it. So we found some fleece with cat heads on it, and spent a long time designing and constructing this fabulous creation. Some real quality time, meaning that we had fun and enjoyed each other's company doing something together.

And I go on being the mother of 2 boys, and everything that comes with that, and if I ever feel like I'm missing out on some special female activities, well, I can just go and put a tutu on the cat.

New Melinda

I had to go to the ID Center to get my badge security changed so I can use the back door and that really good parking area. Only problem is, I hate that place. Ever since That One Time a couple of years ago when I was rushing around like a maniac like I always was and some security guard stopped me and threatened to confiscate my computer if I didn't go right to the ID center and get a number changed on my property pass. So I went right there even though I was in the mode of trying to do about eighteen tasks at once and simply couldn't get it all done no matter what and now this. So when I got there and they asked me for my paperwork I think I kind of went ballistic. Dagger eyes and maybe a few dagger words too. So I half expected to see my face on a WANTED poster on the wall when I got there.

This time I had an email that said all I needed to do was fill out an online form and then forward it to my boss and one other person and all would happen automatically. So I did that, and got a message back that said I still needed to go to the ID Center. So I printed the form and got them both to sign it, and then drove over to the dreaded center. (at least I get to go outside) And when I got there I told the security lady why I was there, and she swiped my card through her machine and then said; "You're already approved, you didn't need to come here!" I looked at her name plate, and saw that she was the person who had sent the message.

Then the most remarkable thing... "Oh well then! Thanks anyways!" I heard New Melinda saying. How very curious. New Melinda isn't a stressed out wreck and therefore can handle these things with grace. She has new shoes with little fish on them. I think I like her a lot! Let's hope she stays around.

What did I do?

Now that I've gotten through the first week (well, 3 day mini-week) of going to work, and the kids going back to school, things seem to be falling into place. In a lot of ways they seem to be going back to the way they were before. Which makes it seem like the last several months hardly even happened. What did I do all that time anyways? Sit around and look out at the lake? Whoops, retrospective amnesia. Do you ever get this? I went and looked at some of my old blogs to see what I had been up to while I was home. Scrapbooking is also helpful for this. Then I can look at the things we've done and say "Oh yeah, we do things, go places, have a happy life."



I sometimes get this way on a smaller scale. I was reading Amy's blog where she lists all of the things she did over labor day weekend. Boy she did a lot! Made me feel my life must be BORING in comparison. So I force myself to remember what I did do. OK so we went to the Peach Festival, and bike riding, and Becky came over, and we spent the day with the Franchi Family, and there was church, and Cale's Big Birthday Party, and out to dinner and to see a concert (Hootie and the Blowfish) with Lynn and Alisa. But she has a picture of Joel tile-ing their bathroom. I wish I had a husband who did stuff like that around the house. Oh, wait, didn't Larry spend the whole day Saturday on a ladder painting the exterior wood trim? I almost forgot about that.



Anyways, now that I've got a few days behind me I'm not nervous about going to work so much. I'm still nervous about whether the kids will be ok but that's always there. It was 90 degrees out this week so I had to wear some of my older clothes (the new stuff is too wintery) but I did wear the new shoes. I have been spending most of my time reading up on what they do in that department. My only complaint so far is that there isn't a window nearby that I can sometimes look out of. I have also connected with some of my good friends from engineering. Which is nice except for being reminded of things from the past that I had finally managed to NOT think about while I was off. (This is where the retroactive amnesia can come in handy) And the people in my new area have been incredibly welcoming. Well, maybe not incredible, they could simply be normal, but compared to when...wait! Never mind! It would be even handier if I could somehow selectively control my amnesia episodes!



So everything is fine, thanks again to all of you for you support with whatever it is I'm going through, it really does help, as always I feel grateful for the many wonderful people I have in my life. (I don't so easily forget that.) I have to go now, I have things to do, such as...go sit around and look at the lake!

A beginning...the End?

I had my first day of work today. It went fine. But last night I didn't really feel like I wanted to go. You know how it is when you are facing some big change that is about to happen. It's like standing at the edge of a diving board, looking down. You know you don't really want to jump. Because everything is all nice and dry, the way you like it, and after this it will be different. Wet. And what if it isn't good, and you can't do it, and water goes up your nose and you are miserable, and what if you get hurt, or sink, or smack into something? What if this is the last moment of happiness you will ever have and then everything is wrecked and it's too late? Then you jump and it's here and your alarm goes off and it's happening and there are bubbles coming out of your nose and you're rising to the surface, and then you know it's going to be ok, you can handle it, make it all work out, swim to the side, even do it again, drive home.

So now that my first day is over I feel better about it, the people seem nice and there was cake. (Someone was leaving the department that day.) I got her desk, and a piece of the cake. And if you know me at all you know how I am about cake.

Maybe I should stop the blog now, end of story, but I think I'll keep it going. It is my artistic expression. I won't be writing about the specifics of my job or the people there. And I'll have less time for this. But I hope you keep on checking in with me, and we'll find out what happens next.

Subpoenaed!

I got an official looking letter in the mail. I have been ordered to appear in court! From what I can tell, this has to do with the rollover accident that I witnessed a couple months ago. You know, the one where the only thing I noticed was the color of the truck that rolled over. But I did give my name and address to the cop who showed up. I suppose I should call the lawyers and tell them how useless I will be, but I have never been a witness before, and I'm kinda looking forward to the experience. (And I can wear my new suit)

I am fascinated with the legal process. I was called to jury duty several years ago and the case was rather pointless but I was enthralled with the drama of it being acted out before my eyes. And I liked the deliberating part. The jurors quickly elected ME their foreman, and then we all admitted that we wished someone would have screamed out You want the truth? You can't HANDLE the truth! And when I got to read off the verdict I wanted to say "Not-guilty-AMUNDO" but I didn't.

Even though my father was an attorney I have had very little exposure to courtroom drama. He never liked us to watch legal shows because he thought they were fake and that he didn't like to bring his work home into his house. (Although I have come to find out that in other families the kids didn't have to sign a contract regarding whose day it was to do the dishes.)

So my knowledge of the courtroom process has come from sitcoms and soap operas. Such as last month on General Hospital where Liz had to testify about what she was doing with Jason on the night that Alcazar was allegedly killed, which calls into question the paternity of baby Jake. Poor Lucky!

I doubt if any paternity secrets are going to be revealed in this car accident case, but if someone shows up in a neck brace I am going to throw my briefcase on the floor.

Objection! Sustained!